The Fear of Separation

That we lose each and everything we hold dear is without question. The assimilation of what is pervasively present takes precedence over the occasional reason for any misgivings. Separation appears to be ceaselessly evident. However, no matter how we are, and what we think we are losing, we should try and remember that we were endowed with companionship, kindness and love and that once received, they never leave us. This appreciation ought to be as continuously there as the inevitable fear of separation. In the memory of what we were given lies the dissolution of the anticipation of loss. This is not mere rhetoric. If we can, and each of us actually can, inhabit the space of benevolence gifted, it never really lifts.

All we have to do is see that we are exactly as we are supposed to be, with our pain, our fear and our joy. The mix of feelings and mental states we always experience is a result of the space mentioned. One might ask how that is. The reason that we hold our fear is likely because we never actually forget or lose the good. The passing of love perceived as gone is really the perception of love itself. It is this that brings forth many emotions and each such state can serve as a reminder that we not only had but forever have what we think we once did. How could it be any other way? We feel pain because we continue to harbor what is not pain. It is only this freedom that is punctuated by its apparent absence. The belief that fear alights because love is gone is perhaps mistaken. It is only what is not-fear that is background. When we feel anguish or say fear, all we have to do is recall that they are there because we continue to have love and kindness. This kindness is never gone once it touches us which is why the pain of separation feels so out of place.

Perhaps the best way to let all this become embedded in our minds is to allow our pain to remind us that it is the presence of its opposite that serves to highlight and mark difficult feelings. If we had only pain or only what is good, we would never know how inerasable goodness and compassion is, even if we think it has been fleeting.

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